May 2012
3 posts
“Don’t it ‘posed ta storm?”
– Portsmouth
“I used to choke on meat all the time.”
– Virginia Beach
“I’m just walking around bored because nobody’s put anything fun in...”
– Portsmouth
March 2012
2 posts
“…and the midget, the ginger, the burrito, and the chopstick lived happily...”
“I jumped up and yelled “my pussy’s wet! My pussy’s...”
– Chesapeake
February 2012
4 posts
“What is this?
A feather duster?
Duther… Fester…?”
– Virginia Beach
“What do you even call a 70 year old woman at a swingers party? Not a cougar.
...”
– Chesapeake
““Oh, I need to show you guys what I got Kayla for valentines day!”
...”
– Chesapeake
“OK JR, Mr. All-American consumer — OH LOOK AT THAT!”
– Chesapeake
January 2012
3 posts
“I just wanna blow on you like Annie”
– Norfolk
“It’s disgusting. Just fucking swallow it!”
– Chesapeake
“I’d wear uggs. I would! Motherfucker, I wear onesies!”
– Virginia Beach
December 2011
3 posts
““You’re usually not thinking about that when you’re all horny...”
– Virginia Beach
““I love your boots! I’ll trade you two kids for them.”
“Oh,...”
– Virginia Beach
“That is exit only, Meghan O’Hara. Like your butthole.”
– Norfolk
November 2011
10 posts
““Are you going to pay? I gave you my card.”
“It’s...”
– Virginia Beach
“I might end up on a sex offender website if I get out of this pool right now.”
– Chesapeake
“I want to play with it now that it’s hard!”
– Virginia Beach
““Like a steel fist, it punches the badge —”
“Did he...”
– Virginia Beach
“I can’t afford no abortion, but I can damn sure afford a bull ride.”
– Chesapeake
“JR, you fucked up my DVDA.”
– Chesapeake
“You’re not a vegetarian if you eat other people’s meat.”
– Chesapeake
““How did we do that? How did we have fun without drinking?”
...”
– Chesapeake
“He’d have been fine if he just downloaded the iCancer app.”
– Chesapeake
““You’re the only one that aged like a normal person.”
...”
– Chesapeake
“Nah, son. There’s no Quicken for hookin’.”
– Chesapeake
“You’re not gonna fuck my girlfriend. I will kill you!”
– Chesapeake
October 2011
7 posts
“I told Kelly, her ass was numbered.”
– Chesapeake
“That shit’s definitely made for cripples.”
– Chesapeake
“Lick it! No! Not with your tongue!”
– Virginia Beach
“She was giving out blowjobs in the parking lot. Well, I guess that explains her...”
– Chesapeake.
“CJ is kind of like a purse, let’s face it.”
– Chesapeake
September 2011
5 posts
“Reese’s Pieces.” I have to make sure I say it slow so I say it...”
– Virginia beach
“Nuh uh! Every rear end I’ve been in..”
– Virginia Beach
“There’s holes there, I’ll just stick it in.”
– Virginia Beach
“I play with those all the time, sometimes.”
– Virginia Beach
““jeez, what is wrong with you?”
“do you need a handjob or...”
– Norfolk
August 2011
4 posts
“I’m as serious as dick cancer”
– Portsmouth
“What are you, the meat whisperer?”
– Norfolk
“I just heard the siren. That means you won’t be able to get a drink for...”
– Chesapeake
“I was only with her because she had cancer.”
– Chesapeake
July 2011
3 posts
“Nobody can please me like me.”
– Chesapeake
“I only use the urinal on the end because that’s the one with a mirror, and...”
– Chesapeake
“Aww, it’s baby’s first experience with a drunk lady.”
– Chesapeake
June 2011
2 posts
“Did you know that I know the owner of church’s chicken?
Really? Why...”
– Chesapeake
“You’ll just have to shake your balls off a little.”
– Virginia Beach
May 2011
4 posts
“Bad things are happening in my mouth right now”
– Virginia Beach
“I have a small mouth, if you haven’t noticed. Oh, I thought I tasted...”
– Virginia Beach
“You have to tug on it to make her come!”
– Virginia Beach
“That’s ok. I’ll just watch the beginning and end, like I do with most porn.”
– Norfolk